Amanda Patterson

What makes a perfect holiday? The hotel? The town? The weather?

Sometimes it's less complicated than that. It's a hot shower after a long flight, a seamless check in and a comfortable bed.

But mostly it's the company you keep. If you're travelling alone, it is advisable that you get to know yourself well before you leave. Bored? With yourself... Interesting. Lonely? You shouldn't be, if you like yourself. Frustrated? Maybe it's time to see a therapist.

I'm grateful I love the man who travels with me. Deeply. He is my true north, my beginning, my middle and my end. I am happy that I like this man. I enjoy his conversation, his wit and his kindness. He knows me. And I know the break in his voice, the smell of his hair, the taste of his skin.

He is my familiar in uncertain territory. His hand holds mine when the plane lurches, his smile finds me when I'm lost in the crowd, and his arms hold me in the darkest of nights.

We are back where we began two years ago. In a beautiful guesthouse in Fresnaye in Cape Town. In the same bedroom in the same bed. I hear our first conversation in the whispers of the walls, I feel our first kisses on the cotton linen of the duvet and I see that once singular me in the reflection in the Victorian mirror.

We venture out on the first night. The Chinese restaurant where we first met is gone. A trendy restaurant, called Beefcakes, has taken its place. 'Cape Town is fickle, my love,' he says. I am his love, or I am ‘precious’. I smile and follow him into the pink flamingo decor of the diner. And there are lots of beefcakes. Behind the bar, serving and being served. The beefcakes on the plates are delicious too. We sit with pink rand patrons, framed with pink-feathered mirrors and enjoy the visual feast. This is Cape Town at its camp and festive best, and I'm happy to share it with my husband.

I am happy. Maybe more importantly, I am content. I look at a face I love across the desk every morning, and every night. His fingers fly across his keyboard. Passionate. Alive. Impulsive. So good for my measured replies. The foil for calm, reasonable, rational me.

We care for each other. We are full of pleases and thank yous, and the simple good manners that bond people for life. For better, forever. And I love him very very very much. And he loves me kazillions. I know that he will have black coffee when he wakes and chai latte when we're out. He will order me a cappuccino and he will smile when I call his name.

He forgets to feed the cats and I forget to make the bed. But we remember to love the children and listen to each other's dreams. We may eat at restaurants with strange names and meet new people every day. We sit in boardrooms and listen to the problems of people we don't know.

But every night, we hold each other, in our sacred space. Mostly after a hot shower and in a beautiful bed.